Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
Randomize
