Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
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