I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
Dislocated my knee during sex, popped it back in and kept going. Then got simpathy chipotle out of it too.
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
Randomize
