you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
I'm drinking beergaritas with a dog who is high and a baby
your completely serious
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
My idiot ex texted me on Valentine's day to tell me I was right, he did need a therapist.
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
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