# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
I'm at subway, this 8 year old kid is judging my fashion sense with his dad. I want to kill myself.
It's ok, he's just 8, he's not judging you.
He just asked why I'm sitting alone. I honestly want to cry.
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
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