are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
Randomize
