and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
I'm going to write a new song and call it "Did I wax my vagina for this?" remind me to never go across the country for a penis ever again.
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
Randomize
