whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
you got in your car and made the sounds of a NASCAR, then called me on your phone and I was your pit crew. then you apparently you won the race, and THAT'S when you tried to backflip off the top of your car.
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
Randomize
