Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
I was going through my mom's stuff to find her xanax, and I found her vibrators instead. Plural. That is like the opposite of what I wanted.
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
Dude, no, you tried to sleep on the stove. I mean. You were pissed when I stopped you... but I couldn't have you catching on fire in my house.
Randomize
