the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
Also I just sneezed literally 12 times in a row so violently...boogers everywhere. Sorry to ruin the sexting. I just felt like you had to know
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
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