dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
Randomize
