Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
Randomize