whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
handjob tips. give me some.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
How do you forget making out with a coworker in the dressing room at Sears on more than one occasion?
...object impermanence?
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
Randomize
