the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Randomize
