You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
I'm jealous of your bromance
Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
Randomize
