All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
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