OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
i just heard Winston Churchill in auto-tune. thank you nerds.
Dude, this is like the 4th time today I've had to use cruise control for a 25mph zone. This hangover is never fucking gonna end.
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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