I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
All of my exes are either overweight and neckbearded or dead. Someone out there is looking out for me.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
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