happiness is walking an amphibious rodent on a leash
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
Randomize
