I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
I took a bird feeder and filled it with alka-seltzer. Can you say fireworks?
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
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