He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
I know its only noon but, Im too drunk to hold this baby...
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
This is the best 30th birthday ever. In a Motel 6 drinking a shower beer and sending slow-mo dick helicopter videos to you.
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
Randomize
