I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
why do cheetos always look like penises
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
They don't have a Valentines Day card for the married guy I'm sleeping with. It can't use the words, love, soulmate, you're the only one for me...and obviously it can't be anything related to spending the day together because that's not happening.
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
Now I have the opportunity to have Chris Pratt or Channing Tatum?!? What a time to be alive.
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Randomize