I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
Randomize
