when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
Can I borrow you for, like, thirty minutes so you can lay on one boob and rub the other until I fall asleep?
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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