So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
bring money and cleavage
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
Randomize
