Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
Well I found out I was essentially dumped and replaced by a hipster and apparently offered a girl $95 to go out with me. In the spirit of the Olympics I will not be spending any time on the medal stand.
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
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