But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
Im in a bar and I just invented a scrabble drinking game. People are cheering. It's like the universe has aligned itself.
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
I've reached too hung over to move status will you bring me something to drink?
I moved out 2 weeks ago remember?
Can you ship it to me then?
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
Randomize
