Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
Oh wow. I almost tweeted #TweetFromTheBackOfACopCarTuesday but I didn't think it was that appropriate
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
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