Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
Most fantastic sex ever until her Doberman took an interest in what we were doing. There was nothing more terrifying then feeling warm dog breath on my ballsack.
tequila makes me forget i have legs
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
I think people are normalizing furries
Randomize
