omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
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