we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
I was just shot with a dart gun by one of my coworkers while walking to the printer. Ironically I was printing my resignation letter...
Foreign objects found in purse this morning include: chocolate covered pretzels, pepper spray, and farm animal shaped key chains (you know the ones you squeeze and fake poop comes out, yea those)
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