are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
My mom just told me to drench my entire body in vodka for 20 minutes. I have never been this russian. no one has ever been this russian
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
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