try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
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