I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
Dude. Get me out of here. I'm surrounded by glitter-faced 40 year olds in halter tops. The desperation here is so thick you can taste it.
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
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