I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
Just crushed a xanax into my chewing gum. Its gonna be a long, fucking up flight...
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
I have surprise drugs for everyone
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
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