i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
You don't know being judged until its 7:30 in the morning and you're on 2 hours of sleep halfway between drunk and hungover wearing pajama pants at an international airport while saying how proud you are that you found the airport's bar immediately and how disappointed you are that it's closed
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Randomize
