Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
It's never too late to be topless.
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
We bought a hamster while completely stoned and 2 hours later returned it because your mother wouldnt let you bring it in her house. You cried. a lot.
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
I haven't lost it. I know I'm not a prophet. It was a joke.
After the edible you claimed you were talking to my cat. We're in our 30s now, what was once cute is now a liability.
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
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