I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
She swung at the pinata with crutches
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
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