God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
We were having margaritas and I was saying "back when I was drinking..." They looked all confused. Then I realized "holy shit they think THIS is drinking?"
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
Randomize
