I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
Randomize
