Sry I called you an 8
As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
I came home and my mom goes "why are you barefoot and where the hell are your shoes?" and I replied "I have French fries"
Randomize
