So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
She wore that goddamn strap-on all night. When she was playing guitar hero it kept getting in the way but she just wouldn't take it off.
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
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