ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
the girl next to me just texted someone in her phone named Optimus Prime
...i wonder what he did to earn that nickname
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Well, fuck this election. I'm getting drunk, regardless of who wins.
Randomize
