Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
She just told me she had a double jointed jaw and winked at me while eating her bananna. That's not possible right?
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
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