Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
I just inadvertently flirted with my coworker's 20-year old son. I've known him since he was 14, yet suddenly he looked different.
You are nothing if not reliable.
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
They finally caught us and banned us forever, but it was worth it because we didn't have to pay for light bulbs for at least 3 years.
So you stole light bulbs, from your favorite bar, and got banned, and you're happy?
Look we couldnt pay for light bulbs and ramen, and you can't eat light bulbs or cook in the dark. Win - win.
Life without a bra equals bliss.
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
Randomize
