We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
The bartender just started bringing me gin and tonic in a pint glass to save himself trips...
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
The salesman looked at me like I was crazy when I explained the need for a headboard that had slats so I could handcuff people to it
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
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