one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
Opened my wallet to find a slice of ham with a phone number written on it in sharpie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
I have unfollowed so many people the only things showing up in my newsfeed are dog rescues and sloth memes
we're at the bar celebrating my ex bootycall getting his new gf pregnant... and me narrowly escaping a future as kitty foreman
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
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