please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
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