My drunk dialing habit needs to go. My drunk habit can stay though.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
Randomize
