I just realized that "Hey girl, when you gonna let me tap that?" is in iambic pentameter. I'm going to write a poem...
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
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