and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
3 complete strangers have joyously high-fived me on campus today. Tell me why, starting after jager bomb #4.
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
Randomize
